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Liverpool FC
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Liverpool FC
Liverpool FC had a meeting and decided to inject some new talent into the club. So they set up a big budget and asked the scouts to search every corner of the world for fresh and particularly gifted players.
Off they went on a tour of the world visiting every country possible, finding quite good and quite talented players everywhere they went, but nothing really so special that it would make any difference to the club.
After some time and running out of places to look they started going through the most underdeveloped and war-torn countries in the middle east.
Whilst walking the streets of Bosnia and just about ready to give up, they stopped and watched a bunch of young lads playing football with a ball of rags, noticing one youngster who was an absolute demon! Running rings round the other kids, scoring goals, ball tricks, the lot, this guy was amazing and the scouts couldn't believe their eyes.
After the game they spoke to him, struck the deal and as soon as they could had him moving over playing for LFC by the next season.
Anyway, along came his first match and sure enough he was just as good as they saw him in Bosnia, the opposing side stood little chance and hardly touched the ball as he more or less won the game single handily.
After the final whistle the rest of the team lifted him into the air while the crowd sang his praises, it was the most exhilarating day of his entire life. While the rest of the team celebrated the highest scoring game in the clubs history, the first thing he wanted to do was telephone his mum and give her the great news.
"Oh Mum, you wouldn't believe it! They absolutely love me! I'm doing so well Mum, you're going to be so proud of me, I've scored 12 goals in my first match, they're going to pay me loads of money and I'm so happy! *How are things at home?.
Suddenly he hears his Mum crying down the phone. "What's the matter Mum?".
She says "I have some terrible news for you son, your dad was shot dead in the street this morning"
"Oh no, that's devastating!" he said
"And then I got news that your sister was gang raped in the park"
On hearing this all the excitement of the day was forgotten "oh mum this is terrible" he sobbed
"And just before you called I got news that your brother has been attacked by a bunch of wild dogs roaming the area and is critically ill"
"Oh Mum what can I say, I am so sorry to hear this".
"Sorry?" she screamed "It's your f*@king fault we moved to Liverpool"
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